Hymas: Comparing is beauty’s downfall

I am a cosmetologist/”hair-apist.” I am lucky enough to play with beautiful women’s hair all day long. BUT THERE’S A PROBLEM! Most of the women I share my world with don’t believe they are beautiful.

They sit in my chair and say, “Oh, if I could just not have this scar.” “ I would love my eyes to be a different color.” “If I could just lose 20 pounds.” “If I could just gain 10 pounds.” “If I just had more time and money I would fix this or that imperfection.” “If I looked like I did in high school…” and on and on.

It is a rare occasion when I get a woman who sits down and knows she is beautiful without any “buts” or “wishes.”

You see, as women we compare. A room filled with women will automatically spawn such questions as:

• Do I look as cute as her?
• Are my children as well behaved as hers?
• Am I the biggest/smallest in the room, or somewhere in the middle?
• Should I have dressed up more for this event?

It is our nature (augmented by the very chemistry of our brains) to compare … then self-doubt.

We are hard on ourselves. We think because we compare and focus on our flaws, so does the rest of the world.

I am going to tell you a secret: Nobody has an easy life. Nobody is perfect. And really, most people around you are in their own heads focusing on their insecurities … just like you.

Here is another secret: You will continue to get older — we are not aging backwards. Gravity will continue to pull on your skin creating wrinkles. After age 25, your tissue stops building and begins to deteriorate. Some things you just have to accept … then move on.

So give yourself a break. Stop hiding behind your comparisons and step into the world. Instead of beating yourself up because the you wish you were doesn’t exist, start making the world a more beautiful place because you are in it.