9 fun bits of advice about marriage from famous folks
All marriage relationships have their own little bits of quirkiness. Quirkiness can be good. We can even learn from each other. It helps us realize that being marriage can—and should be—fun. Here are a few comments on marriage from a few famous folks.
1. Garrison Keillor, the witty host of radio show A Prairie Home Companion, said, “The rules for marriage are the same as for a lifeboat. No sudden moves, don’t crowd the other person, and keep all disastrous thoughts to yourself.” He went on to tell of a miserable speaking trip he had, and after an equally miserable flight home, said how happy he was to see his wife waiting at the curb in her car. He said, “It is good to see her. We’ve been married ten years, and surely we have problems, but at the moment, I cannot think of a single one. We drive through the streets of St. Paul, and there is no place I would rather be. Misery is the secret to happiness in marriage. Go make yourself miserable and then come home.” (Garrison Keeler, Reader's Digest Sept 2015, p. 98)
2. Ray Barone, the beloved comedian from Everybody Loves Raymond, said, “Look, you want to know what marriage is really like? Fine. You wake up, she's there. You come back from work, she's there. You fall asleep, she's there. You eat dinner, she's there. You know? I mean, I know that sounds like a bad thing, but it's not." That’s what a good marriage is—being with someone you can count on.
3. Jay Pritchett, character from the TV hit show Modern Family, made a statement that may ring true for many marriages. He said, "When you're young and dreaming of your family, you think of this perfect family—perfect wife, perfect kids. Look at me, I got this sorry bunch. But, you know, I wouldn't trade them for anything." Don’t we all feel just a little bit like that at times?
4. Justin Ricklef, author, husband, and father of five says, “Kiss Each Other First. I'm imperfect at this, but I try to kiss Brooke first when I get home from work. Before I kiss our five kids. It's a small thing that points to a much bigger reality. For me to be a great dad, I have to be a great husband, first. Otherwise, we'll become roommates who are collectively raising our kids."
5. Jenny Dewey Rohrich, photographer and blogger, in her article 10 Ways marrying a farmer will change your life gave this wise counsel. “Go with the flow. It's not worth the energy to get your panties in a bunch over trivial things.” She gave an example of how her farm life is unpredictable. She said, “You never know when your husband will suddenly decide that ‘insert farm task here’ is IMPERATIVE to get done and he's off in a flash when you had plans to spend the day together… Or go on a date… Or just cooked a fantastic Sunday meal.. Whatever the situation may be, just let it go. Go with the flow.”
6. Lisa, a blogger on Club 31 Women, who describes herself as “the happily-ever-after-wife to Matthew and mom of 8", told of how her husband delights in tossing their many bed pillows at her at the most surprising times and laughs his head off over it. And so do the kids when they hear the shrieking from Mom, which is his whole purpose in doing it. Then they’re all laughing.
She laments, “But you – you feel sorry for me don’t you?"
“Good!" she continued. "Because now I’ll tell you some of the ways I get my revenge. I’ll crawl in next to him and put my icy little feet up against his warm back (hah!). Or the next morning I’ll sneak in while he’s taking a hot shower and suddenly turn the water to cold (how did he know it was me?). Or drop down a Screaming Monkey from the balcony when he’s reading in his favorite armchair."
"Oh yes," she added. "I have my ways.”
In other words, married people, spice up your lives with some hilarity. It’s healthy for a marriage.
7. Dr. Carlfred Broderick, author, marriage and family therapist and popular speaker, told newlywed husbands to not expect their wives to be like their mothers. He shared a time at the beginning of his marriage when he was sick with a bad cold and went to bed. He said, “I waited and waited for my wife to bring me some orange juice, like my mother had done all my life. She never did. I finally called to her and said, 'Why aren’t you bringing me orange juice? Her reply, 'I didn’t even know you wanted any. And why would I when you’re perfectly capable of getting it yourself.' His counsel, “Don’t expect your wife to be your mother. Or to be able to read your mind.”
8. Tom Hanks, the actor most people can’t resist going to see, was being interviewed by Ellen DeGeneres on her show. Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson had just celebrated their 25th anniversary and Ellen was praising their long-standing marriage. She said, “You’re a good couple.”
What Tom said next touched the hearts of the audience, even though he wasn’t entirely serious.
"I'm not one to suck up to the audience, but the only thing we ever argue about is who loves each other more," the 57-year-old Oscar-winner spilled.
"Awww…so sweet," Ellen responded, with a laugh.
9. Alfred Hitchcock. We conclude with the wise words of this famous mystery author. "The ideal husband understands every word his wife doesn’t say."
Gary Lundberg is a licensed marriage and family therapist. Joy is a writer. Together they author books on relationships. See their new .99 e-book “Wake-Up Call: What Every Husband Needs to Know” on amazon.com. Their website is garyjoylundberg.com.