Prepare Thyself To Slay Monsters On Your NaNoWriMo Quest
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For those not in the know, November is National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo for short), an event designed to help wannabe novelists turn the novels in their heads into actual words on a page. The stated goal is for writers to pound out a 50,000 word manuscript in 30 days, or about 1,670 words a day.
As you might imagine, this is not the easiest thing in the world to pull off, especially if you’re not an experienced writer. On top of that, real life can get in the way. These obstacles are like monsters, standing in the way of your successful NaNoWriMo quest.
These monsters must be slain if you are to reach the pinnacle and achieve the 50,000 word goal. Lucky for you, I’m heading into my sixth (has it really been that many?) year of NaNoWriMo, and I know how to slay these monsters. You just need the right weapons.
The Monster: The Fear Phantom
This spook aims to stop your progress by intimidation. It plants the thought that you can’t do it in your head and then supplies plenty of reasons why you’ll fail. And it can petrify you if you let it.
The Weapon: The Hammer of Reality
If the Fear Phantom gets his hooks into you and tells you it can’t be done, hit back with a cold dose of reality. Every novelist who ever wrote a best seller is a person, just like you. Additionally, thousands of people hit their 50,000 words each year. If they can do it, certainly you can, too!
The Monster: The Word Count Wendigo
The cunning creature strikes when you get too hung up on your word count. Perhaps you’ve missed a day or two or have fallen behind. Perhaps you’re overwhelmed by the sheer number of words you feel you’re supposed to be putting up. That’s when the Word Count Wendigo strikes, sucking your will to live. Or at least your will to create.
The Weapon: The Torch of Minimization
Wendigos don’t like fire, and our Word Count Wendigo is not different. So, if you hit him with flames from the Torch of Minimization, you’ll soon see all those intimidating numbers for what they are. 1,670 words sounds like a ton, but it’s really only about four pages. “4” sounds a lot more attainable than 1,670. Put your word count in the right perspective and you’ll be caught up before you know it!
The Monster: The Distractosaurus
The Distractosaurus is a shape-shifter, and can take on many forms. It can appear as work situations, family members, even Facebook! The Distractosaurus will drain away the time you need to get to your goal, so the faster you can get rid of him, the better.
The Weapon: The Holy Headphones of Antioch
The Distractosaurus raises an amazing ruckus that can stop you in your tracks. But by enveloping your ears in headphones, you can cancel the monster’s influence on you and send it scampering back to its cave.
The Monster: The Abominable Burn-Out
This fiend strikes when you’ve poured your heart and soul into your work, leaving you sucked dry of desire to keep writing. Or it could hit when you get tired of writing every day.
The Weapon: The All-Powerful Blade of Break Time
Slash through the Abominable Burn-Out by taking a break when you need one. If writing is becoming too much of a slog, walk away. Go see a movie. Hang out with friends. The break will refresh you and you may find your writing will improve quality-wise, as well.
The Monster: The Fatigue Zombie
This creep bites you and drains your energy. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up sleeping away like Sleeping Beauty on Ambien.
The Weapon: Caffeine Atom Bombs
Give yourself a kick to the hind quarters and blast the Fatigue Zombie to oblivion with a quick shot of caffeine. You can go with coffee, soda pop, or even energy drinks. It’s all deadly to the Fatigue Zombie. But don’t lean too heavily on Caffeine Atom Bombs, and remember to take care of yourself. If you don’t, Caffeine Atom Bombs can run you into the ground as easily as they can give you a lift.