Book review: Method meets intuition and flourishes in ‘Straight Talk’ parenting book
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"THE STRAIGHT TALK ON PARENTING: A No-Nonsense Approach on How to Grow a Grown-Up," by Vicki Hoefle, Bibliomotion, $16.95, 240 pages (nf)
Vicki Hoefle is a mom, parenting expert and teacher when it comes to the process of taking small children and rearing them in a way that creates adults who can handle themselves and the situations life throws at them with ease and aplomb.
Her book, "The Straight Talk on Parenting: A No-Nonsense Approach on How to Grow a Grown-Up," is based on some fairly simple but not-so-intuitive advice. She tells parents they need to figure out their goals — such as "cultivating respectful, honest and loving relationships" with their children — then get there in a straightforward, calm and uncomplicated way.
It sounds too easy to be true, but one finishes reading the book with the sense that it is not only doable but also rewarding. And it helps immensely that she explains not only goals but also the methods to achieve them.
Most people know they should model healthy relationships and self-control to their small children and then continue it as the children grow. But knowing and doing are not the same thing. Hoefle gives solid strategies for tamping down excess heat, raising interpersonal warmth and parenting with good instincts.
She peppers the pages of the book with many small stories that demonstrate parental successes and failures. The book's purpose is to help parents create independent and capable adults because to focus on anything less is to put the very children one loves at great risk and harm their futures.
Underpinning everything is sound advice on how to create strong relationships with children, which are not only desirable but also necessary to teaching and guiding and being a role model.
It's not an instruction book, per se, because Hoefle makes the point that each child is different and that what he or she responds to will vary.
Hoefle notes that much of the work is "trusting your gut," and this book provides some solid, helpful gut checks. It's an interesting, thoughtful companion to the journey that is parenthood, especially for those early years.
Email: lois@deseretnews.com
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