‘Let me tell you about my addict.’ Mom pens powerful essay after daughter dies of heroin overdose
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Carrie Wheeler, Kelsey Wheeler’s mother, wrote the following after her 25-year-old daughter died of a heroin overdose.
I’ve seen and heard negative posts and comments about addicts or addiction. Some thinking that an addict is worthless or less than everyone else. Let me assure you – that addict is everything to someone.
Let me tell you about my addict.
My addict weighed 3 lbs. 14 oz. and was born the evening of May 10, 1992. It’s was Mother’s Day and one of the best days of my life. She was so tiny, she wore cabbage patch doll clothes for a month.
My addict was so beautiful from the day she was born with her locks of dark brown hair and deep brown eyes. Her entire life she was complimented on her beauty. She was not only beautiful on the outside but more beautiful on the inside.
My addict, from the time she was little, had the biggest heart and wanted to help others and save animals. She would come home often from school, especially during colder weather, to explain to us that she gave her hat, or coat, or gloves to her friend because he/she didn’t have one and she knew we could replace it for her. She would share her lunch or give her money to a friend who she felt needed it more than she did. She even gave a few pair of boots away.
My addict preferred cheesecake with cherry or blueberry toppings for her birthday instead of a chocolate or white cake for her birthday.
My addict was the proudest big sister ever. She loved her “sissy” (that’s what she called Kimi) very much. She was very protective over her little sister.
My addict loved animals. As a little girl, her first rescue was a crab from the ocean in California. She asked if she could bring it home to care for. Of course we said no but she snuck in her sock. It made it to our destinations … but didn’t smell very good.
She rescued many cats and dogs in her lifetime. Her most influential rescue was Buddy. She was volunteering at the Humane Society. Buddy was found out in the winter weather with frostbitten feet and tail. He wasn’t old enough to eat solid food, so she took him home and nursed him back to health. Unfortunately he did lose his tail. They shared a very special friendship of 13 years until my daughter’s passing. We now have the privilege to care for Buddy.
My addict was a daddy’s girl and loved to fish with him as a little girl. As part of their fishing trips, they’d get chocolate milk and donuts (her favorite). As she got older, she loved camping, fishing, sitting around bonfires, listening to music and riding her dirt bike with her family and friends.
My addict was easy going. Her favorite outfit consisted of jeans, a T-shirt or hooded sweatshirt and Ugg boots.
My addict loved the color purple, collecting beautiful rocks and mountain wild flowers. She wanted to get married in the mountains some day.
My addict wanted to be a massage therapist.
My addict was friendly to everyone, and would try to help anyone in need up to the day she passed. She was such a caring person and many times would give her food away to help a mother and her children, leaving herself not much to eat.
My addict gave me a beautiful grandson Korbyn. She loved him so very much. He was the light of her life. She stayed clean for 18 months. Unfortunately in one year, she broke her wrist, which required surgery; she had kidney stones that required surgery to remove; had her gall bladder removed; and tubes tied. The pain medication supplied after each of these surgeries, as opiates, made it difficult for my addict and the cravings were too much to handle. She started using meth and heroin again. The drugs took over her body and mind.
My addict loved her family and friends very much. She was loved by so many and touched so many lives.
My addict loved to write poems and letters to her loved ones. She often put her feelings on paper. She loved to write in calligraphy and I’m blessed to have all of her pieces. She loved to color special sayings and poems.
My addict had a smile that would light up a room, and her laughter was very contagious. I will never forget her laugh
My addict was not perfect. She made some bad choices, like all of us have. Her bad choices ultimately cost her her life.
My addict had to have her Mother hug her the last time at the funeral home in a coffin.
My addict was so much more than her addiction or her bad choices.
Think of that one thing in your life that you’ve done that you’re ashamed of, that you don’t want anyone to know about. Is that the one thing you would want everyone to judge you on?
My addict, in the end, was given back to me to bury in the ground. We visit her often and decorate her resting place for the different holidays and make sure it’s as beautiful as she was.
So next time one of you see someone who struggles with addiction and begin to think negative thoughts about them, know that they are much more than just an addict. Know that those are the ones that need the most help and love not the most judgment. Know that person is someone’s loved one, someone’s world, someone’s everything, and you should thank God that it’s not yours because addiction doesn’t discriminate, it doesn’t know color, race, social, or financial status.
If you or a loved one need help with addiction, please message me. My daughter would want me to help as many as I can. She hated being an addict and fought very hard to stay clean and seek a treatment facility that would accept her given her poor insurance coverage for inpatient treatment.
I love my daughter. I think of her every day and miss her so very much. As a grieving mother, I still don’t know how I’m going to get through the loss of my daughter. I try to keep my family and grandson at the forefront of my mind. It’s what helps me get up and face the day.
Love you to the moon and back my precious angel. I hope heaven is amazing and you are at peace and feel free again and not controlled by drugs. Until we meet again.